Thank GOD I'm Alive!

Here I was trying to figure out "what next?". I am jack of all trades, king of nothing. Should I do it? Jump of this balcony right now and end it all. Three seconds flat, like a television turned off, a flash of white and then complete darkness. Ooh! Thats the problem- complete darkness. I tried that once. Sitting in my room, lights out and curtains drawn. It was the closest I could come to it. Until that tiny glint of moonlight ruined it all. It rather made me think- I can go downstairs right now and join my folks for dinner.Two sets of television running, but we still have quarrels of who gets to watch what. So much food, but our taste buds want a particular flavour. If you dont get what you want, you leave in protest, until you get what you want.
So much to do, so little time. You plan, and you plan and you plan. Miracles do happen though, more than you think they do. Yet, I fail to understand my purpose here. I am writing random shit, but I am not drugged or drunk. Its just a different style today.
What if I made a movie on myself? Hmmm! It would definitely bomb. Such a boring cliched life. But miracles do happen. Maybe I can pretend to be this Hollywood celebrity, write about my imaginary life, and share it with my public.
"Hi people! The rumours about Angie and I splitting are true. I am devastated at the situation, as much as you are. Its been a wonderful journey though. Angie is a wonderful woman, an amazing mother and a great lover. The kids have no idea about it. Maddox is sitting on my lap, as I write this. Tears are running down my eyes and he asks me, "Whats wrong daddy? Why are you crying?". Told him it happened if you stared at the screen for too long. He still didn't understand. He will, one day, some day. God I hate my life. I'm over 40, I don't have kids of my own, women use me and leave me. Jennifer was the worst. I still haven't won an Oscar, though my movie has been nominated this time. What's the point? Even if we win, Quintin gets to keep the statuette. Wish I could just kill myself, end it all. One pill and poof, into oblivion and endless darkness. Heath, here I come mate."
Gosh! even celebrities, don't have it easy. I guess I will go down and join my family. I can smell the lovely kerala style beef curry from here. Yummy!
Thank GOD I'm alive!